Sisyphian Task

Jacob got some balloons last night from Uncle Brian and Aunt Teresa. He loves them* dearly. You know the old adage: If you love someone, you have to let them go. So this is where one of the balloons wound up today:

As you can see, we have a nice cathedral ceiling in our living room with an open walkway on the second floor. Too bad the balloon was too far to reach from the second floor. Aus a tool was required. Here were the three I thought might do the trick:

A fan, a feather duster and a ball walk into a bar...

The fan was useless, since any breeze it generated was too weak to move the balloon. The string moved around a little. The telescoping feather duster seemed like it would do the trick. Appearances are deceiving:

Maybe a footstool would have helped (or a tripod)

I did think about using the vacuum cleaner's telescoping wand to suck down the balloon's string and thereby get the balloon, but I feared the balloon would get destroyed in the process. That left hitting it with a small, Nerf-like ball. The sort that Lucy likes to chew on because she can get chunks out of it. Luckily this ball has joined Raggedy Ann and Andy in WITSEC, so it was fully able to serve in a covert mission while the children slept. After two hits (shamefully the number of throws was many more than two), the balloon made it to a reachable spot:

In fact, I left it for Jacob to find. After his nap, he was delighted to grab the string and pull in his balloon. All is well until the next release. Or Lucy gets a hold of it.

*I realize the use of "them" is ambiguous. Of course he loves the balloons AND Brian and Teresa.

Product Non-Review: BugBite Teether

The folks over at ThinkGeek offer a wide variety of practical and impractical items to satisfy the geeky needs we all have. I assume you must have some level of geekiness in you if you are reading this blog post. You can assess how high you rate by considering how you are reading this: more points the more recently you purchased the reading item; still more points for how mobile the item is (desktop vs. laptop vs. handheld/smart phone); yet more if you actually are mobile right now. But I digress. Certainly you must have some idea of how much of a geek you are.

One of the items purported to be practical is the BugBite Teether. Consider their justification:

When babies are born, they really can't defend themselves from zombie invasion. About all they can do is hope that their brains are small enough to not be noticed in the teeming hordes of screaming adult humans. If that fails, they need to hope their supersonic screaming drives away the zombies. Luckily, at about six months, babies start to get teeth, giving them a line of defense. It's important for parents to encourage their baby to use these shiny white weapons by giving them a teether.

It's an interesting argument. By "interesting" I mean completely silly. The irony of using biting against zombies who are famous and fearsome for biting is not lost on me. Also not lost on me is the fact that biting a zombie seems just as likely to turn the biter into a zombie. It all comes down to the  mechanics of the zombie epidemic. If a voodoo curse or death has to occur before one can become a zombie, then the little biter would be okay. But if a virus or some such biological contaminate causes zombification, then your setting your child up for failure. And no one wants their child to be a failure, do they?

We have not purchased this product, so I can't comment on the quality or durability of the construction. Or how tasty it is. So I can't recommend or not recommend the teether. But don't think this is a panacea for the inevitable zombie apocalypse.

Maybe they should make some sort of teether that tastes like brains that you can throw at zombies to distract them while you make your escape. Hopefully they'd be sold in multipacks. Or the teethers could be so attractive that the zombies fight over the teether rather than mobbing you. I'll have to look for a suggestion box on their web site.

Zombie Review: The Walking Dead, TP 2

The Walking Dead Volume 2: Miles Behind Us by Robert Kirkman

ZPAA rating

Late teens and up (use your judgment based on content summary below)

Gore level

8 of 10--Zombies are less prominent but still gruesome in glorious black and white (or at least as close as you can get to glorious in black and white).  So, close to a 10 for gore.

Other offensive content

Lots of bad language (f-bombs and such), human on human violence and abusive language, an extra-marital affair that causes stress and acting out, several instances of sexual activity. There's no nudity but there's also no doubt about what is going on.

How much zombie mythology/content

There's still no explanation of the origin of the zombies, but that isn't what the book is really about. Some of the characters flirt with the idea that maybe the zombies could be cured, but the idea is presented as impractical and highly unlikely (how do you unrot flesh?).

How much fun

The enjoyment of The Walking Dead series is not based on fun, wise-crackin' zombie hunters. The series tries to delve into the issues of how people would react and would change for better and for worse during a zombie apocalypse. The conflicts are resolved in thoughtful and thought provoking ways.

Synopsis & Review

Volume Two of The Walking Dead starts with the burial of the previous leader of our group, Deputy Shane. A flashback reveals that he had at least a one night stand with Sheriff Rick's wife. Very soon after the group packs up to go, she reveals that she is pregnant. It isn't stated but is clear that she isn't sure who the father is. Thus begins their life on the road to find a more permanent place to settle since it's fairly clear the government isn't going to come and save people near major cities like Atlanta.

The group must be moving north, because they deal with a lot of snow. On the way, they pick up an African-American ex-football player, his daughter and her boyfriend along the way. With the RV getting very tight, the group jumps at the chance of living in a gated community they stumble upon.

Spoiler alert!! The gated community does not work out so they hit the road again. As they hunt along the way for food, Rick's son is accidentally shot by a farm hand on a nearby farm. The farmer is a former veterinarian named Hershel Greene. Greene patches up the son and lets them stay while the son recuperates. When Rick asks if they can stay in the barn, Greene says no because his other son is in there along with other zombies. Greene hopes that they will be cured. Rick thinks that's crazy. The situation deteriorates when a failed zombie capture results in the death of several people and the extermination of the 10 or 15 zombies in the barn. Then Glenn from Rick's group shacks up with one of the farmer's daughters, causing more trouble. Tense discussions are had and Greene kicks them off the farm. Quickly running out of food on the road, the group thinks they've hit the jackpot when they find a prison that looks like it's still intact.
End Spoiler!!

Seeing the group abandon the 1950's concept that the government/army will save them, they begin their search for a more or less permanent home. This hope is quite palpable and they start to wonder what a normal life would be like. They never get too far because problems keep cropping up to force them to move on both physically and personally from whatever comforts they may find. Life seems only to get harder for them as a parent dies, they face a pregnancy without the familiar medical care, gas and food become more scarce. The hope of a stable future is what keeps moving them forward. The end of this volume gives them what they think will be a permanent solution.

The plot moves along fairly well. Characters come and go (yes, "go" is mostly a euphemism for "die") at a reasonable pace, i.e. they aren't one-dimensional stereotypes but well thought out and well developed. And well executed (in both senses of the term). The reader does start caring more and more for the core group. Intriguing subplots are woven into the story as well (what are the daughter and boyfriend up to besides intimate relations?).

I can't wait to find out how they deal with the new situation they are given at the end of this book. Come on, volume three!!

Available at Amazon (see link below) and at fine comic stores near you, like my favorite Third Eye Comics in Annapolis, Maryland.





By the way, here's the trailer for the series that will start on AMC Halloween night 2010:

Book Review: What the Heck Were You Expecting?

What the Heck Were You Expecting?: A Complete Guide for the Perplexed Fatherby Thomas Hill. Three Rivers Press, 2000, 141 pages, $11.95 US.

Brief overview of content:

The book follows a standard format for discussing issues relevant to husbands who are also fathers. After pre-birth and the first day, the book goes month by month through the first year  followed by chapters on the toddler years and "childhood and beyond." The chapters are divided into several sections:

• What Your Above-Average Baby/Child May Be Doing
• What Your Wife May Be Complaining About
• What You May Be Concerned About
• What It's Important to Know
• What to Be Terrified About This Month
• A Few Things to Say to Let Her Know That You Are Caring, Sensitive and Up on the Required Reading

As you might guess from these headings, the book is a very comical take on the practical advice a father needs to have. Legitimate good advice is mixed in with comical commentary. For example, when discussing teething pain the author writes about rubbing a little Scotch on the baby's gums to ease the pain. He then discusses the best types of Scotch, from which regions and the importance of not skimping on price where your baby is concerned. Such "medicine" is also helpful for the father in dealing with the child's growing pains.

Author overview:

From his Amazon page: A native of Ithaca, N.Y., Thomas Hill is a creative executive for Nick@Nite and TV Land. A veteran of Harvard, the United States Chess Federation, and fatherhood, Thomas has five children and lives with his family in Verplanck, N.Y.

Recommendations:

1. Read cover to cover vs. consult as needed.

Since the book is divided chronologically, it is easy to read one month's worth of advice during that month or just before it comes. There's no index but the table of contents gives a detailed outline of each chapter's contents beyond the bullets mentioned above.

2. Readability.

Light-hearted and highly entertaining, this book is very readable.

3. Helpful to a parent?

The book is one of the few that are written from the dad's perspective and focusing on his role. The advice in the book is entertaining and mostly useful, though some part just seem added for comical effect. Reading it is reassuring--you know you're not the only dad who is clueless.

4. Did we use it?

In spite of the excellent advice on buying Scotch, I still haven't made a purchase. We did go "low key" for Jacob's first birthday party, which the author recommends. First birthday parties really are for everyone else to get together and have a good time. Jacob and Lucy won't remember their parties at all. Except for all the pictures on Facebook, of course.

Sample text

On how babies think: The key to understanding babies lies in recognizing that their primary task during these early years, beyond the basic survival skills, is to analyze and comprehend how the world works. They are scientists. Furthermore, you should recognize that as a parent you are not a fellow scientist, a lab assistant, or even a great teacher. You are part of the experiment. You are one of the prime subjects of observation and study. [p. 88]
Truer words have never been spoken. We here at the Zombie Parent's Guide couldn't agree more. We know who is in charge and have some vague idea of what is going on. As much as they will let us know. I hear the master calling for a snack and must go now...

Note: this book is not available new from Amazon unless you want if for the Kindle, so you'll probably have to hunt around libraries and local book stores for it. Or buy from one of the Amazon partner sellers. You should support local sellers and libraries anyway, because where are you going to find stuff when the zombie apocalypse happens? Who knows where Amazon warehouses are hidden? I found this book at Royal Oak Bookshop in Front Royal, Virginia, so maybe don't try there since I bought the last copy.

Jacob Tries to Raise His Genius

Lately, Jacob has started to take books off the living room bookshelves and flip through them. These books are Mommy and Daddy's collection, including many works from my days as a philosophy graduate student. I caught Jacob in the act with one particular volume:

What, where are the pictures?

The book in the photo is Aristotle: On Interpretation, Commentary by St. Thomas and Cajetan. Maybe he is looking for ways to interpret what we tell him in a more favorable light. Parent says, "Jacob, finish eating your vegetables." Jacob says, "If I don't eat any more, then I am finished." We better put that book on a higher shelf.

He has also pulled down several volumes from the Loeb Classical Library series. In case you don't know, this series is famous for having the original Latin or Greek text on the left-hand page and an English translation on the right-hand page. Since it is just as easy for Jacob to read Greek and Latin as he reads English, the books provide no additional challenge to him. Wanting to know about souls and breath sounds awfully Frankensteinian to me. Luckily, Aristotle doesn't mess around with the occult or mad science. Jacob will need to do more research. I'll keep a close eye on him next time we go to the library. Or when he is trying to get new videos on YouTube.

Zombie Review: We're Alive

We're Alive: A "Zombie" Story of Survival

website for the podcast
subscribe in iTunes or Zune players

MPAA/ESRB/Other rating

Parental Advisory Explicit Lyrics/ iTunes tag Explicit

ZPAA rating

Teens and up

Gore level

4 of 10. Since this is an audio drama, you don't see anything. Some of the sound effects are pretty realistic sounding but not stomach churning.

Other offensive content

Lots of bad language, increasing levels of human on human violence, two innocent animals in jeopardy (or are they innocent?!?).

How much zombie mythology/content

The zombies here are mostly classical, spreading their infection via biting others. The big difference between these and classical zombies is they move faster (28 Days Later speeds and up) and some of them seem awfully intelligent. There is a hint of a "ground zero" from which the zombies emanated, but no details have been given by the end of season one for the origin or cause of the zombies.

How much fun

Both situational humor and occasional jabs at zombie cliches are found in this podcast. The story line grabs the listener and brings you along for a great ride. The characters are engaging and well acted, making you want the next episode asap.

Synopsis/Review

Three soldiers, Michael, Angel and Saul, are called up to help quell a riot in Los Angeles. When they get to their headquarters, they realize this is no ordinary riot. People are going after each other in frenzied, frantic attacks everywhere. These soldiers wind up at an apartment building which they think will be relatively easy to fortify. Gathering a random groups of civilians and whatever supplies they can, the intrepid band searches for answers about how the zombie hordes started and how they can be stopped.

This audio drama comes out in weekly installments of about 20 minutes each (season 2 starts/started on August 23, 2010). The production values are extremely high, with great sound effects and atmospheric music. The writing is sharp and with the podcast format the creators can have cliffhanger endings to episodes without shoehorning them into a time slot. Consequently, there's no filler and also nothing left out except to create more suspense.

The actors all deliver fine performance. Some of the characters when first introduced seem a little cliche (I'm thinking primarily of the "no field experience" officer who leads two Iraq War vets and the very Clint Eastwood-esque gun store owner), but they are quickly moved beyond one dimension through character development. The cast is big enough to give the listener a variety of people to identify or agree with while not losing track of who is who. Also, the role of narrator switches from the army guys to other characters, allowing a balance of points of view and following different action in different locations.

I've really enjoyed what I've heard so far and can't wait for the next season of episodes to start next week!

Sample text

Check out their promotional video (warning: one use of crude language)

The Purpose of Eyes

Lucy tipped her hand this week. Last week we reported her interest in the eyes of Raggedy Ann. Yesterday she inadvertently revealed what her plan was for those peepers.

In the afternoon, Mommy noticed that something wasn't right with Lucy. She was keeping her mouth shut far too long. And what was that mysterious bulge in her cheek? It was this:

Obviously, there's no pic of Lucy caught in the act

We couldn't believe that she had tried to swallow an eye! Even a little magnetic eye. That brought back bad memories of the dinner scene in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom for me. Which makes me think, "Maybe Kingdom of the Crystal Skull wasn't really such a let down." But, alas, it was.

Rest assured we are keeping both eyes on her lest she get both eyes in her.